Just to mention this foe brings fire to their eyes
Next to Ole Miss and Bama, there's no other name
That disgusts Bayou Bengals like that of Too-Lain!"
These stirring lines opened The Unknown Poets’ tribute to LSU’s season finale against the Green Wave.
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| L-R: Poets 1, 2, 3 |
The year was 1980. The disco craze was waning, while punk had evolved into new wave, and then went mainstream. America would lose its innocence yet again a few months later outside the Dakota Apartments. Gas lines were behind us, but the Iranian hostage crisis remained unresolved. The country looked cautiously at the upcoming November election and pondered what a possible Reagan presidency might mean.
"Where have you gone Joe DiMaggio? Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you." (Paul Simon)
Yes, people were looking for heroes after years of Watergate and then the Carter-era malaise. The time was right for Poet mania.
Much like what four young men from Liverpool had done to a generation before, that fall three Louisiana working class lads shocked the world and captured the hearts and minds of LSU fans everywhere. Each week during that season, the Poets produced a rhyme tribute to the upcoming football game. Typical was this one for Alabama:
All eyes must turn to the Bear from the east
Little red creatures washed up on the beach
Are surely within the Tiger paw’s reach
The Bulldogs have proved the Tide can be beat
Still to beat Alabama would be a great feat
So go Bayou Bengals, keep up the pace
Put a hound’s-tooth hat in our trophy case
Their story was told in Tiger Rag, "The Bible of LSU Sports" and their poems published in Smiley Anders' column in the Baton Rouge Morning Advocate as well as in the Shreveport Times. There were appearances on Hap Glaudi’s radio program on WWL and several times on the seminal late night LSU sports program “The Super Fan Show” hosted by Harold Herthum and the legendary G. A. “Goober” Morse. That show became the standard by which later pretenders would be measured.
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| Put us in, Coach! We're ready to play. |
“The Unknown Poet will tell no rhyme before its time!” (Unknown Poet Number 2)
The Poets and their writings were beloved by fans numbering in the thousands, or possibly hundreds... certainly tens, or at the very least high single digits. Okay, likely just friends and family. Whatever the count, they personified the expression "legends in their own minds".
But there were also negative responses to the Poets’ work. The aforementioned Tulane poem had the inflammatory ending:
As the season closes, so does my rhyme
So go Fighting Tigers, mop up the green slime
This evoked the following rebuttal, also appearing in Smiley’s column, from an irate Tulane fan:
“The poet who called the Tulane team slime
It has ever been thus, for eons of time
And proof of their limited English”
Some misinterpreted the Poets’ intentions, as that same year, frustrated New Orleans Saints fans put on their infamous paper bags to hide their embarrassment at a team that would wait another three decades for Super Bowl success. It was in fact shortly after the Poets debuted on television that the first Ain'ts bags appeared, and some suggest that was not mere coincidence. UPDATE: It can now be confirmed they were first! Doing a check, the Poets debuted on TV 30-Oct-1980, prior to the Ole Miss game; while it turns out the first mention of the Ain'ts bags, hawked by someone calling himself the "Unknown Fan" occurred the following week.
However the Poets donned their purple K&B Drug Store-sourced headpieces, not out of shame, but to deflect glory from themselves to the Tigers. Their inspiration had been the Unknown Comic, a regular on the 1970s television program, "The Gong Show", who likewise hid his identity with a paper bag. Actually, who was the real Unknown Poet was itself in question, as each of the three wore a jersey proclaiming himself to be the bard.
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| Their Christmas card, sent to fans and the media |
Eventually the fame and fortune led to squabbles by some demanding meatier roles, and fights over creative control, putting strains on the high profile group. Fast living, women, alcohol, drugs; it eventually came crashing down and they split up.
Where are the Poets now? No one knows and persons once close to them can only speculate. Number 1 was last seen living under an overpass, his belongings in a shopping cart, inexplicably mumbling “I’m in control.” It is thought Number 2 grew Rastafarian dreadlocks and became militant beat poet UquePeeT, whose name (pronounced U-K-P-T) hints at a connection; however the artist will not acknowledge any former affiliation with the group. After years of fighting over ownership of the name, Number 3 hired ringers 4 and 5 and briefly toured the Indian casino and county fair circuit as “Bubba Boudreaux and the Real Unknown Poets”.
“Your candle burned out long before your legend ever did” (Elton John)
Like Haley's comet, the boys burst on the scene, their flame burning brightly for a brief time, and then faded away as quickly as they arrived.
Now 30 years later, we pay tribute to their legend and legacy.
The Poet's last rhyme, written for the 2011 Cotton Bowl:
The Unknown Poet has gone gray and grown old
Still he cheers for the team wearing purple and goldThe paper bag once worn to predict Tiger wins
Now carries Viagra, Polident, and Depends
This bard and his poems are to most long forgotten
He returns now to speak of the bowl named for cotton
The Aggies are there for plenty good reason
For Bevo they roasted ending a great regular season
It is "The Hat" for whom they now must hold fear
As well as his legions who all Tiger fans cheer
Mike the Tiger will roar, seen by all in the nation
While Reveille limps, tail between legs, to College Station
Though a phoenix arising from 30 years biding
Now this writer must simply go back into hiding
Who knows when the Poet may surface again?
But for now he's calling this a big LSU win!
SPOILER ALERT!
Read the real story below.
The admittedly over-the-top story shown above, written in 2010, is largely true, though obviously with much hyperbole. Adrian Case, John Ridge, and Agra Templet were friends and coworkers at Ethyl Corp. in Baton Rouge who began toying around with creating poems about LSU football games early in the 1980 season. Adrian got the idea to contact Smiley Anders of the Morning Advocate, who included one in his column. They then started writing new ones each week that Smiley also published.
In the meantime, a television program about LSU sports called the "SuperFan Show" began to be aired once a week after the 10:00 news on one of the local stations. Idea man Adrian called the producer and the next thing you know, the trio was booked to be on the air. Since they were "unknown" they had to come up with a schtick. Initially considering Lone Ranger masks, they settled on purple K&B (a defunct drug store chain) bags, cut out for eyes and mouth like the"Unknown Comic." The Poets actually appeared three different times, and were also featured Hap Glaudi's radio talk show on WWL, as well as.on WVUE in New Orleans.
Below, the unmasked Poets after a taping of the Superfan Show.
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| L-R: Adrian Case, John Ridge, LSU OL coach Lynn Leblanc, voice-over announcer Felix Martin, Harold Herthum, Goober Morse, Agra Templet |
Though John actually wrote the poems, it was Adrian's wheeling-and-dealing that made it what is was and got them the notoriety. Agra handled photography and graphics. The guys had a great time doing it, though their wives at the time thought they were crazy.
Poet No. 2 Adrian passed away in 2012, and afterward John and Agra felt it appropriate to reveal the men behind the paper.
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| L-R: Agra Templet (No. 3), Adrian Case (No. 2), John Ridge (No. 1) |
